Tulsa's Last Magician

Well Tulsa's last magician got his start at four Pulled a quarter from his own ear and spun it on the floor Since there's no good tricks but old ones and lyin' ain't that hard He saved up all his quarters and he bought a deck of cards And he learned ragtime piano, though his teacher thought him slow Got a black belt in karate from a pawn shop video And he'd practice all his worst mistakes in a dirty bathroom mirror And when his mother drank, he learned to disappear And his classmates thought him funny and good at sleight of hand But he had this grand finale they refused to understand It's hard to tell the whole truth of a family sawed in half And that's why Tulsa's last magician left his home so fast Well down and out in Reno, broke in Santa Fe Turnin' tricks on Los Sueñeros out in the Californ-i-ay They pushed him up against a wall, said buddy get a grip So he learned to set himself on fire on the Las Vegas strip Then he wandered down to Tampa, blew everybody's mind 'Cause the crowd was cheap and easy there, On beer and blow and wine They said I wonder where my dollar went, How'd the flower bloom so fast He said I can't reveal my secret, though they rarely failed to ask And the crowd all thought him funny, and good at sleight of hand But he had this grand finale they refused to understand They demanded explanation when the card pulled was their own And that's why Tulsa's last magician lost his faith and headed home Well he said he'd learn computers, like his second foster dad And free-range all the rabbits that were livin' in his hat His investments all went swimmingly, he had the boss on hidden strings His promotions were a certainty, he could make the numbers sing Now time and space is easy for magic to control Still it was forty years of workin' 'fore he noticed he was old And now his great escaping act is just untying both his shoes And most days he's in the easy chair, yellin' at the news And the weatherman is funny and talkin' with his hands But black clouds are comin' in, and no one understands That somebody's true religion's always someone else's joke And that's why Tulsa's last magician pretty much went up in smoke So friend if you're the kind that thinks No one quite gets quite what you are Like you're cobbler or mechanic in this age of flying cars If you think that you see right behind what's right before our eyes You might be a small town's last magician in disguise And we need you to be funny, please be good at sleight of hand 'Cause there's a grand finale we can't hope to understand And there's a 1 in 52 chance it's all magic and it's true So won't you please help us believe in you?