Deny Me Certainty

Imagine all of the faces that Would have been Could have been Me Could have been me It lies beneath all The words on the tip of my tongue So deep that I can't Even understand what's going on A silence that eats away Creating an itch that I can't replace One day I bury The next I am digging To find and hide answers I don't even have questions to Let me Decide What I'm gonna do Head down I carry on When I sit in silence I'm not the one Telling myself I'm done I can't, I won't, there's nothing else left Is it a disease or is this humanity? Cause I can't see what's in between Is it Uncertainty? Or am I denying certainty? Denying certainty If I'm only lying to myself Is it just as dishonest As the smile on my face? This is My Deniable admittance This is Why I cannot stop For even a Single second Now It's Staring right at me I can taste it Poisoning normality And When It finally takes me I'll finally know that it wasn't insanity Head down I carry on When I sit in silence I'm not the one Telling myself I'm done I can't, I won't, there's nothing else left Is it a disease or is this humanity? Cause I can't see between Deny me certainty Now I've poured a little too much out Standing alone No one to hear as I shout With the vultures above Every eye locked on me And a six foot hole underneath My feet Fuck it I'll be worm food Think of The faces Think of all the faces that could have been Me If I'm only lying to myself Is it just as dishonest As the smile on my face? Head down I carry on When I sit in silence I'm not the one Telling myself I'm done Head down I carry on When I sit in silence I'm not the one Telling myself I'm done I can't, I won't, there's nothing else left Is it a disease or is this humanity? Cause I can't see in between Deny me certainty This is My Deniable admittance This is Why I cannot stop For even a single second