Push

We laugh in the mornings and we speak free at night

I peek at your presents from my phone despite

The "you" you made for everyone, not just us

The joke isn't funny, now it's out of touch

I cried and our present is being subdued by

The ache of our past in a silly disguise

It was only yesterday we crossed paths

In the bathroom doorway with a suicide pact

Count the months on one hand since the kitchen

Became the only place that we could be friends

Alone in our house, at least we were friends

Spend every day with you now to make up for it

Every waking moment I spend stringing special words

So I can share myself with you and the only ears that heard

I will never cross paths with you again

I will never be away from you, my friend

If we make it to heaven, it will be the same one

And if we only get to hell, then we will fight with shared guns

Remembering my life now

I wake up in your house

I don't worry of the months on my hand

I use them to cling to you instead