Happy Now

Pick up my phone, I shouldn't check again But here I go, jealous of all my friends They've got it figured out, I don't Stuck on a loop, getting all in my head So much to do, I can't count the endless hours I've spent I'm failure prone Time's always been an enemy Scaring me half to death I fell asleep at 17 and woke up 30 So I let me down Unfulfilling expectations Wishing I could be complacent But I'm freaking out Count for hours years I've wasted Thought I'd be happy now Happy now Happy now, happy now, happy now, happy now Happy now Happy now, happy now, happy now, happy now Closing my eyes, try to deny I'm here How is my life everything I feared Running this maze with no way out, no Has it all been a lie, am I deluding myself Put it all on the line or put it all on the shelf Tell everyone I'm fine when I really need help Cause I'm too proud to hear it So I let me down Unfulfilling expectations Wishing I could be complacent But I'm freaking out Count for hours years I've wasted Thought I'd be happy now Happy now Happy now, happy now, happy now, happy now Happy now Happy now, happy now, happy now, happy now Happy now Happy now, happy now, happy now, happy now Happy now Happy now, happy now, happy now, happy now