I Wanna Be a Producer

Unhappy, unhappy

Very unhappy

Unhappy, unhappy

Very, very, very, very, very, very, very unhappy

Oh, I debits all the mornin'

And I credits all the evenin'

Until them ledgers be right

Until them ledgers be right

I spend my life accounting

With figures and such (Unhappy)

To what is my amounting

It figures, not much (Unhappy)

I have a secret desire

Hiding deep in my soul

It sets my heart afire

To see me in this role

I wanna be a producer

With a hit show on Broadway

I wanna be a producer

Lunch at Sardi's every day

I wanna be a producer

Sport a top hat and a cane

I wanna be a producer

And drive those chorus girls insane

I wanna be a producer

And sleep until half past two

I wanna be a producer

And say, you, you, you, not you

I wanna be a producer

Wear a tux on opening nights

I wanna be a producer

And see my name, Leo Bloom in lights

He wants to be a producer (Sell it, girls)

Of a great big Broadway smash (Don't forget the balcony)

He wants to be a producer

Every pocket stuffed with cash

He wants to be a producer

Pinch our cheeks till we cry, ouch, eek, ooh, oh, ah yes

He wants to be a producer

With a great big casting couch

I wanna be (He wants to be)

I wanna be (He wants to be)

I wanna be the greatest, grandest

And most fabulous producer in the world

He wants to be a producer

He wants to dine with a duchess and a duke

I just gotta be a producer

Drink champagne until I puke (Drink champagne till he pukes)

I wanna be a producer

Show the world just what I've got

I'm gonna put on shows that will enthrall 'em

Read my name in Winchell's column

I wanna be a producer

'Cause its everything I'm not

Unhappy, unhappy

So unhappy

Very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very

Sad

I wanna be a producer

Hold everything

What am I doing here?

Mr. Bialystock was right

There is a lot more to me than there is to me

Stop the world, I wanna get on

Bloom, where do you think you're going?

Mr.Marks, I've got news for you, I quit

Here's my visor

My Dixon Ticonderoga number two pencil

And my big finish

I'm gonna be  a producer

Sound the horn and beat the drum

I'm gonna be a producer

Look out Broadway, here I come

(Well then, here he comes)