This Is What Self - Destruction Feels Like

This isn't easy I don't know how and what to feel Keeping busy It does the job but it doesn't heal My mind is a fire And I'm burning love away It's getting harder to feel And they all say You need to take care of yourself, my darling But they don't know how it feels to be broken I can't help it, I feel numb I'll wait for the waves to leave and come I think I'm breaking I'm a mess in the making, hmm A mess in the making, hmm I'm getting tired Of the same old feeling in my chest I'm not a liar But I've got secrets I can't confess Don't say you love me 'Cause I don't understand those words It's getting harder to feel And they all say You need to take care of your health, my darling But they don't know how it feels to be broken I can't help it, I feel numb I'll wait for the waves to leave and come I think I'm breaking I'm a mess in the making, hmm A mess in the making, hmm I'm holding on a tightrope And know I'm not coming home Hurting, searching You know I'm not coming home This isn't easy I don't know how and what to feel Keeping busy It does the job but it doesn't heal