Runnin'

I don't love myself Really hate this skin, yeah It's hard to admit but I gotta commit 'fore I break this pen No one even knows of the place I'm in Or how dark all these days have been I just keep it all deep inside I drink and drive, then pray again For some time I been on my own Writing songs in the dark alone About how I'm far from home Even though I'm home it's all unknown I called on God then he calls my mom She calls me like, "Mark, what's wrong?" Said I'm fine, she said, "Quit lyin' I know you been drinkin' all night long" Didn't admit that I been cryin' I been sippin', I been dyin' I been tryna find peace Tryna find me, I don't know who I am I don't know what my purpose is Or why my brain resurfaced this I pour my drink, then go to sleep 'Cause the more I think the worse it gets I just need to go somewhere far and I'll be okay I don't need your help, I'll do this shit but in my own way I need you to leave me alone (leave me alone) I need you to leave me alone (leave me alone) Even if I try my very best you know I can't stay All I do is run and I'll be runnin' till my last days I need you to leave me alone (leave me alone) I need you to leave me alone (leave me alone) I run from love but I run to pain It sucks 'cause I love you but I can't love you, it's such a shame And no, you're not the one to blame You probably think I'm runnin' game This comes from my childhood Girl, if I was good then I would stay I think it's fear of abandonment I don't know how to handle it When they come and go I crumble slow just like I did as a kid It made me toxic and hazardous You won't trust anyone after this I'll say goodbye to make you cry Then afterwards plant a kiss I pray for all these changes All my friends have turned to strangers My ex girl who I wronged Is moving on and I don't blame her I've been, been so selfish I've been broken, I can't help it To the ones I've hurt, for what it's worth I'm sorry for what you've dealt with I just need to go somewhere far and I'll be okay I don't need your help I'll do this shit but in my own way I need you to leave me alone (leave me alone) I need you to leave me alone (leave me alone) Even if I try my very best you know I can't stay All I do is run and I'll be runnin' till my last days I need you to leave me alone (leave me alone) I need you to leave me alone (leave me alone) I need you to leave me alone (leave me alone)