Sales Freak

Let me tell you bout a crazy story Let me tell you what I do for fun Let me tell you bout my fame and glory Odd job hobby, two for one I like playing with the minds of the people I like saying all my lines really well People tell me that I'm kinda deceitful But I ain't tryna play you I'm just trying to sell Well I'm oversharing so I'll spare you the details Presales, Retail Can I get your email? (Please) When I'm famous I'll be making it a sequel Death of a salesman Asian female! Life is sales and sales is life And if I fail in love I'll make sales my wife You might not quite get it or know the appeal But Imma show you mothafuckas how to close the deal Let me see you put your wallets in the air Wave em around like you just don't care And it might seem a little bit scary Don't worry, a price tag is arbitrary! (That's right!) Let me see you put your wallets in the air Wave em around like you just don't care We only live for a limited time So call now and get it for just 9.99 I'm, I'm, I'm a sales freak Other girls like to go for the clothes I prefer to try to go for the close Get my freak on when I'm hitting the phones Or when I'm busy getting everyone to go to my shows Ha Cause I've been selling all over the place I put a foot in the door or get a door in the face I could get a broken toe and still get in the gate And then I follow these steps when it's time to negotiate Step one, establish value Write a pitch so rad, it could smash a statue Step two, define your market How you gonna make a sale without finding your target Step three, anchor the price By using a high number as a priming device Step four, assume the sale Be assertive and confident, and you will prevail Now Let me see you put your wallets in the air Wave em around like you just don't care And it might seem a little bit scary Don't worry, a price tag is arbitrary! (that's right!) Let me see you put your wallets in the air Wave em around like you just don't care We only live for a limited time So call now and get it for just 9.99 I'm, I'm, I'm a sales freak When you're sitting in the boiler room Think of what your employer would do Cold calling is annoying, it's true So how do you haul ass while enjoying it too I like to think of it as exercise Cause actually sales tactics are effective in life If you happen to be like me, the competitive type You could hack your daily habits with some mental advice Say, hey, maybe you've having dating trouble Change your ways and think about it like a sales funnel Cause whether you're a sex god or virgin Increasing prospecting increases conversion Here's a tip from a psychology nerd Humans have a hard-wired reciprocity urge So if you offer something nice or some advice to somebody They'll wanna buy your product more (Did it work, it probably worked) The theory of cognitive dissonance (What's that?) Is an easy way to operate business (Why's that?) Human beings want to seem consistent Contradict their beliefs, make them question existence (Woo) Animatronic behavioral economics Can make you a profit off of the product of your choice I don't need a Rolls Royce, I just need my sales knowledge World domination with my voice and degree from college Let me see you put your wallets in the air Wave em around like you just don't care And it might seem a little bit scary Don't worry, a price tag is arbitrary! (That's right!) Let me see you put your wallets in the air Wave em around like you just don't care We only live for a limited time So call now and get it for just 9.99 I'm, I'm, I'm a sales freak