Tig Ol' Bitties

It was the first day back to school Cuttin' up in class, actin' like a tool Friends were rollin' in, we started talkin' about the summer Deejay saw Twilight, "Bummer!" I spoke up, and I asked my friends "Are there any new girls? 9's or 10's?" Hopin' a few hotties had moved from other cities And in walked this girl with tig ol' bitties Woo, I can't believe my eyes In a contest, they'd win first prize Double-D guarantee, I was checkin' their size It's like two beach balls in a shirt disguise Or Earth and Mars having some fun Wait, I take that back it's like two of the Sun But at this point I let my mind run And drifted off thinking about them tig ol' bitties Tig ol' bitties, Mt. Fuji brought it's twin Tig ol' bitties, two melons in a shirt Tig ol' bitties (Tig ol' bitties) I put books in my lap Tig ol' bitties, head bobbing as she walks Tig ol' bitties Oh my god! Tig ol' bitties Tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties Tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties Tig ol' bitties Kept trippin' in class 'cause of her dang breasts In a tiny white shirt, boobs having a fiesta Later in lab, we were messin' with test tubes Couldn't take my eyes off the new girl's chest Boobs! Wasn't paying attention Got busted, had to serve detention In biology we talked about the bees, the best kind of bees Boobies! Woo, I can't believe my mind I hold a poker face to her two of a kind With each step her breasts gettin' redefined I'm making my move, I'm thinking it's time Oh snap! I'm gonna ask her to prom And in my head she responds, "You're the bomb!" Feeling nervous, so I count to three "I like your boobs, go to prom with me?" Tig ol' bitties, King Kong boobs Tig ol' bitties, great tracks of land Tig ol' bitties (Tig ol' bitties) Like my balls Tig ol' bitties, real big Tig ol' bitties, oh my god Tig ol' bitties Tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties Tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties T-t-t-t-t-tig ol' bitties Tig ol' bitties She said yes, so I'm getting ready Stain on my shirt, Mom's spaghetti I pick her up and I'm pretty sure That she'll let me motorboat like I try to cop a feel once we get to school She said, "No touching, that's the rule" Principal walks up on the scene "It's time to announce prom king and queen Your Favorite Martian and Tig Ol' Bitties Congratulations to you both on winning" Time slowed down and she jumped for joy Then out of her dress jumped something more Tissues flew and rained from the sky "Oh my god! You stuff your shirt?" Your Favorite Martian in a world of hurt Aw, fake ol' bitties Wow, fake ol' bitties You're breaking my heart with fake ol' bitties You're crushing my dreams with fake ol' bitties (Fake ol' bitties) I can't believe it, fake ol' bitties You really suck, fake ol' bitties I can't believe you would do that, fake ol' bitties (Fake ol' bitties) Why would you do that when you're just trying to get everyone's attention? Those aren't boobs, they're lies! Lies, I tell you! But you know, I'm still down to make out if you If you want to, want to come back with me You know what? Never mind (Where them tig ol' bitties at?)